Have you ever felt like you’re being pulled in a million different directions and your body is SCREAMING for you to just stop and be still, but you can’t hear the screaming over all the noise of life? Well, that has been my week. Don’t worry, this post isn’t going to be a pitty party. It’s more about the lesson I learned this week.
I enjoy taking care of people. I’m good at it, and it blesses my heart more than it ever could theirs. The sad thing is many times I spend so much time making sure everyone else’s needs are met that I forget and don’t make time to meet my own needs. I spend 9 hours/day taking care of the sweetest 87 (88 on May 2) year old lady with dementia, CHF, and Diabetes. I spend the remainder of my day trying to meet the needs of my husband and children. I don’t want to be a super hero, but I do want them all to look back at life and say, “My wife/mom did everything she could to help us, inspire us, and make life great for us.” Being that wife/mother takes WORK! My job in itself is mentally and emotionally exhausting. Those that know anything about a dementia patient will understand this.
So, take my normal week and add baseball games, school meetings, The Brain Phase, and 18 hr/day intermittent fasting, and you have this week! Don’t misunderstand me, I am a blessed woman with a great job, a magnificent husband, and incredible children, BUT my body was SCREAMING at me this week, but I couldn’t hear over the chaos.
Other than my 30-40 minutes spent with God in the mornings this week, there was no silence. So, this morning when I unrolled my yoga mat and turned on my iPad to do Yoga With Adriene: True 30 Day Journey, I was completely blown away and brought to tears at her word of the day…LISTEN. She had kicked my rear all week with focus on core workouts and upper body. My abs are sore when I giggle and my hair has looked like a rat’s nest all week because it hurts to raise my arms above my head. Not joking! Sorry if you saw me in public this week. I haven’t given up on myself, I’m just sore! 🤣🤣🤣 Today was a gentle yoga session spent in silence listening to my breath, being present in the moment, and I even got to hear some gentle words of encouragement from the Lord during my time on the mat this morning.
Since the weather is warmer, generally people wear less clothes in Spring and Summer. Well, when you’ve lost nearly 80 pounds, you have extra skin to go with it. It ain’t pretty! I want to wear a cute sundress, but I have “bat wings” hanging from my arms, and I’m having to wear granny panties to smooth out the apron of skin hanging from my abdomen. I’ve become especially self-conscious of these aspects now that the weather is warmer. I will be honest, I cried about it a little this week. However, while I was LISTENING this morning, the Lord reminded me through Adriene’s words that, “You’re doing amazing, and this will all be worth it when you are at your healthiest!” Thank you, Lord, for always knowing just what I need! Thank you for forcing me to LISTEN!
Now, the lesson learned from all of this is that I’m going to dedicate at least 15 minutes/day to just sitting in silence, whether it be on the yoga mat or in the bathroom, wherever I can find that peaceful place. While taking care of others is something I love, taking care of myself is important too. Do you know what your body is telling you? I encourage you to take the time to listen. The moments spent in silence help dissipate the cloud of chaos around you.💗